Q: What is Box B, Bucksville?
A: If you had sent fifty bucks you would know.
Q: I did. My check is in the mail. When will I get a receipt?
A: Your receipt is in the mail.
Q: Where did you get the title Box B, Bucksville?
A: From a catalog. It didn't come from any single place, really, it has
always been here. As long as we have been using cash we have lived in
Bucksville.
Q: What else have you purchased from classified pages?
A: Sex, happiness, foot massage, lobotomies and breakfast.
Q: Other than that, what is your major source?
A: Stupid questions. Interviews. The need for impossible and ridiculous
goods and services inspires me divinely. For instance, every desk needs a
clean little diesel powered crayon sharpener. I got one when I graduated
from finger paints. Fuel tanks should look just like computers.
Q: Like my computer...
A: Right. The diesel sharpener goes on the corner here where the desk is
real strong, and you'll be surprised at how fast that little jewel will
sharpen crayons, erasers, pens and the like. I'm really not sure where
ideas come from, they just happen.
Q: Have you ever been called crazy?
A: Sure, but if I was rich I would be called eccentric.
Q: Will Box B make you rich?
A: Having something so unusual is wealth beyond measure, sharing it is no
sacrifice, knowing it exists is rare, distributing it is another mail
order business, and there is a department in Heaven for me when I get there.
In times like these the need for humor increases. Remember the comedy,
and movies, that grew out of the Great Depression. I stand to laugh when I
sit to write. Humor will get me through times of no money better than
money will get me through times of no laughter. Isn't that divine?
Q: So there is a divine purpose for Box B?
A: Short of insulting a lack of intelligence, it is designed to provide
humor. Humor comforts us,
and helps us to confront our fears and make them less heavy. If we can't
afford all that we want, we should learn to laugh at our wants and face
our fear of lack with courage. There is no problem so great that levity
and humor won't lessen. Depression is an attitude. So is enjoyment of
all that Life brings us. Our wants, when unfulfilled, inhibit liberty.
Box B is intended to remind us of how absurd some of our wants are.
Q: Is there anything more you want out of Life?
A: A greater forum, but I am perfectly happy laughing at this stuff all
by myself.
Q: What is your favorite ad?
A: The Speed Forgetting ad, but I forget why.
Q: What do you consider the most outrageous ad you've done?
A: What have I done that isn't outrageous?
Q: Well, I remember one you did advertising for musicians to join a
chamber pot orchestra.
A: That's not outrageous, that's tasteless! The most outrageous ads are
the Glownad Enterprise ads selling lead chain mail underwear and other
nuclear waste marketed as consumer goods.
Q: Is there anyone or anything that Box B doesn't make fun of?
A: Yeah, but I won't reveal that. There is little coming through the major
media that does not beg to be lampooned. I even created an interviewer
so I could write this. Now that you know, read on, and enjoy.
Dysclamor: These materials are not endorsed, approved, sponsored or provided by
or on behalf of the University of Arkansas, Fayetteville.
Last updated 2/8/2018